


Chaos Crawling

by HanaHimus



Category: Persona 5, Persona | Revelations Persona
Genre: Canonical Character Death, F/F, Gen, M/M, Minor Appearances from Akechi P1Protag and Igor, Minor Reiji Kido/Naoya Toudou, Persona 5 Big Bang
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-01
Updated: 2019-03-01
Packaged: 2019-11-06 20:31:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,956
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17946629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HanaHimus/pseuds/HanaHimus
Summary: Ren Amamiya, nephew of Reiji Kido, gains a new and ridiculously powerful Persona from a fusion accident. Nyarlathotep brings worry, nightmares he can only remember while he’s dreaming, and new bite to his words. As this is happening, his fellow thieves grow worried at the sudden cold and rude demeanor of their leader. While trying to navigate Shido’s Palace, they begin trying to search for answers as to why Ren is acting like this (and find an answer more horrifying than anything they expected).





	Chaos Crawling

**Author's Note:**

> For the Persona 5 Big Bang! o/ I was super duper excited to work on this and I wanna say thanks to my wonderful artists, who I will link to at the bottom of this fic! I also wanna thank all the lovely mods and other creatives that were a part of this for making it so dang fun <3
> 
> Also thanks to all my friends/mutuals who always support my creative endeavors bc tbh without them I would have never ever applied for this--
> 
> Either way! I hope this fic is enjoyable, be it that you know P1/2 or not. The main focus is still on P5, so...!

Ren Amamiya was used to fusion in the Velvet Room at this point, and quite frankly it was hard to tell if that was a good thing or not. Being desensitized to things like guillotines didn’t _seem_ like a good thing, he was sure; but getting through fusion easier was a plus, meant he’d used it more. Though he had to admit there _was_ one part he wasn’t very used to, thanks to it being such a rare occurrence.

Fusion accidents were always hard to watch. The guillotine would stick and he’d be left there to witness the twins’ fix for it, cringing away as Caroline pulled out a _chainsaw_ from… somewhere to manually cut the head off of the Persona. It was pretty damn gruesome and upsetting for a number of reasons. One of the biggest reasons being, of course, that he didn’t get the Persona he wanted.

And here he was, watching it happen yet again. Great… That Baphomet would’ve been _so_ useful if that hadn’t happened! Well, whatever, he guessed he could just see if what he got was any better. Sometimes he was lucky enough for that to be the case, though not often.

Caroline stepped back from the now headless Persona and Ren watched as his new Persona appeared before his eyes. A nearly monochromatic figure stood there, nearly pure black, from clothing to body, to mask. It held a silver cane of some sort in its hands, some design on the suit it was wearing made of the same material. The only splash of color on the Persona was a ribbon of sorts on its mask, stripes of yellow across it.

Ren felt a strange sort of twinge when he saw it and it began to speak within his head, introducing itself.

 _“I am Nyarlathotep, the Crawling Chaos. Let’s get along as we destroy your enemies._ ”

With that, the Persona entered him and he let out a sigh. It felt a bit different than it usually did, a little less welcome than usual, but he was sure it was fine. After all, it seemed a lot stronger than any Persona he’d used before. Maybe this was what extra power felt like.

“Inmate…” Caroline looked at him with wide, almost fearful eyes. “That Persona…”

“I suggest you use it in a fusion right away. Or better yet, fully discard it.” Justine spoke up, her calm voice now tinged with hints of anxiety. “It will not prove beneficial to you in any way.”

Ren frowned and couldn’t help but give into his desire to sass the twin wardens a bit, seeing as their guards were down. “I’m sure it’s fine, girls. No need to try to mother me when you only come up to my hip.”

Caroline huffed, slapping her baton against his cell. “Why not show some respect when we show concern for you, inmate?! It’s a rare treat for you, after all!”

Justine sighed, shaking her head. “We cannot force you to do anything. However, something about this Persona, Nyarlathotep, seems dangerous. If you do not heed our warnings, we cannot help you.”

Ren frowned, if these girls felt so off about it, maybe it _was_ a bad idea? He looked towards Igor, lip quivering ever so slightly in confusion. Maybe the old man had some words of advice?

“Girls, I see nothing wrong with the Trickster proceeding with this Persona. Any worries in your head should be ignored.” His deep voice bellowed out across the room, causing the wardens to straighten their backs in a mix of respect and fear.

“If you say so…” Caroline still sounded unsure, though Ren could tell she was trying to mask it. That was almost cute.

“Understood, Master. We shall allow the inmate to do as he pleases with his new Persona.” Justine was better at masking any worry she still had from her voice, but the way she flipped through the pages of her clipboard told Ren all he needed to know.

“It’s nice that you girls are worried about me, but I’ll be fine!” Ren gave them both a smirk. “It’s just a Persona, after all.”

He was actually still kinda worried himself, but he could get past that, he was sure. Maybe it would be like when he first got Arsene, sorta weird at first, but something he would acclimate to soon enough. And if not… He guessed he could always come back to the Velvet Room and fuse it away like any other.

The girls gave each other an uneasy glance, but said nothing as Ren backed out of the Velvet Room and back into his own body. He came to in front of the Velvet Room at the start of Masayoshi Shido’s Palace. They had made it about halfway through when they decided to return to the entrance to leave and (hopefully) come back in about a week’s time. Ren had decided to try and fuse some before leaving, telling the rest of the group to just wait a minute… And there they were, waiting.

Panther and Noir were huddled close together, giggling and smiling at each other; Queen and Mona seemed to be discussing what they would do when they came back and what should be done before then; Skull and Oracle were bickering about this or that (who knew what exactly, not like Joker had been listening)... And Fox was waiting for him to come back to.

“I see you’re done with staring into space, Joker.” He gave a small smile. “It seems we can leave, then. Excellent.”

Ren gave a nod. “Yeah, let’s go!”

\--

Ren laid down that night with the nerves Nyarlathotep caused him earlier slowly fading from his mind. They’d go back soon enough and he’d see how he felt then, but for now it seemed okay. Only issue was he felt so _exhausted_ , more than he usually did when he went to the Metaverse.

“Let’s get some sleep now…” Morgana yawned, stretching out next to Ren before settling next to him. “Good night, Joker.”

“Good night, Morgana.” He closed his eyes, curling up next to his not-cat. He was going to sleep well tonight.

_Ren’s eyes shot open at the sound of footsteps. He wasn’t lying in his bed anymore, instead standing in the middle of a Japanese style room. He looked around, trying to decipher if this was a dream or not and, if it was, why he was dreaming of a room like this._

_His eyes finally settled on the center of the room. Sitting there was a man who looked almost identical to his Uncle Reiji, sitting next to a low table and drinking what Ren assumed was sake. He stared at the mystery man as cherry blossom petals floated around them._

_“Who…?” His voice caught in this throat as he tried to speak._ Who are you?

_The man looked up at him and Ren couldn’t help but once again compare him to Uncle Reiji. Their faces were almost exactly the same, though this man’s face was scarred at the cheeks and showed plainly while Uncle Reiji tried to hide his forehead scar. He was also wearing sunglasses, even in a dream that struck Ren as odd._

_“I'm Takahisa Kandori.” The man stared at Ren as the teen tried to find any sign of eyes behind the shades (to his concern, he could find none). “I'm sure you've never heard of me. Reiji wouldn't make it a habit to mention his hated half brother, after all.”_

_“You're right, I don't know you… So…” Ren crossed his arms. “Why am I dreaming about you?”_

_Takahisa chucked, taking another drink of sake. “It lies in your new Persona, boy.”_

_With that, a figure appeared before the man. The being was mostly black, it's arms and legs somehow a mix between human and octopus. Blocks of green protruded from its arms and legs, blue and white suction cups decorating the lower parts of both. Its face and part of its body was covered by a broken, golden Buddha statue, only a single red eye peeking out._

_Despite it looking nothing like his, the name Ren’s brain wanted to give this Persona was Nyarlathotep._

_“It's a shame, really.” Takahisa spoke again. “It seems you'll be joining a long line I'm a part of, instead of your uncle's depressingly short one.”_

_“What's that mean?” He furrowed his brow and took a step forward. “What line are you talking about?!”_

_Takahisa stood, the smile he'd had on his face the entire time vanishing. He said nothing as Ren grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and shook him. Ren couldn't read him, at all. Why? This was so frustrating…_

_“Say something!” No reply. “At least take off those glasses, let me see your--”_

_His voice caught in his throat again when he ripped them off. He… He had_ no _eyes._

 _He took a step back, questions evacuating his mind to be replaced by_ fear. _He was seeing this eyeless man because of Nyarlathotep?_

_He let out a scream and..._

Sat up in bed, breathing heavy and body covered in sweat.

“Hey, are you okay?” Morgana’s voice, filled with concern, hit Ren’s ears and pulled him from his fear fueled stupor.

“Yeah… I'm fine.” He pat Morgana’s head. “I just had a nightmare…”

“Really?” Morgana sat up. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Yeah. I was in a room with a man and then…” Then… What happened then? “I'm not not sure. I can't remember anything that happened after that…”

“Well, that's okay. We don't always remember dreams, especially the ones that upset us.” Morgana pat Ren’s leg. “Let's try and get back to sleep.”

Ren nodded, laying back down. “Yeah, good idea.”

\--

When Ren had suggested a Mementos trip out of the blue, no one had had it in them to argue with him. Shido _was_ sort of a personal villain for him, so it was understandable that he wanted to get as strong as possible before facing his Shadow. The only thing that wasn’t as understandable was the fact he wanted to go a day after they decided to take a break on the Palace to regroup and resupply…

“So, Joker, is there a reason you were suddenly struck with the urge to come to Mementos?” Noir asked with a smile on her face, in an attempt to mask worry.

“I got a few new Personas yesterday, before we left. One wasn’t what I was expecting, so I thought I would try it out before we go back to uncharted territory.” Joker shrugged. “I’ll probably try it out for a bit before switching out for another one, anyway.”

“That’s fair enough…” Queen nodded as she slid into Mona’s driver’s seat. “But don’t push yourself too far.”

“I won’t, don’t worry.” Ren shrugged as he and Fox slipped into the front seat with Queen. “You guys should know I never push myself too hard.”

“I’m not so sure about that…” Panther sighed as Mona began to move into Mementos. “But if you say so…”

Joker said nothing in reply and soon enough they came across Shadows. With a quiet gesture of ‘go ahead’ they pounced.

They slammed into the Shadow in front of them, splitting it into multiple beings. Wasting no time, they split into two teams to take on the creatures. Joker, Fox, Noir, and Mona made their way to the main group of Shadows, while the other three fighters dealt with the leftovers.

“Nyarlathotep!” Joker let out a yell, ripping his mask from his face to allow his new Persona to come forth. “Eiagon!”

A cursed wave of energy hit the Lamenting Sacrifice, destroying it as if it was nothing.

Joker didn't stop there, cutting into another foe as he had Nyarlathotep bash another over the head with its cane. He felt so _powerful_ right now, more than he ever had in the past.

This Persona was the best thing to happen to him.

The enemies weren't done yet, it seemed other Shadow groups had noticed the fighting and joined in on the battle. Not that Joker minded, quite the opposite. This was a chance to flex these new Persona muscles even more…!

He was so focused, however, that he didn't notice the worry overcoming his fellow thieves’ faces.

Skull and Panther shared a look, Panther biting at her lower lip. Skull couldn't even bring himself to shrug to try and calm her nerves. He didn't get why Joker was sticking to a Persona so much when he never had before, either.

“Joker!” Oracle's voice rang out, though the phantom didn't seem to notice. “Noir’s in trouble, you need to help!”

She was trying to suggest he switch to a healing Persona, seeing as Queen and Mona were too busy fending off other Shadows to assist the beauty thief, but he didn't. Instead, he struck down the Divine Warriors near her before darting to the next group.

Panther could feel her worry grow as she summoned Hecate, casting Diaharan before Noir was totally destroyed.

“Joker, what the hell, man?!” Skull yelled after his friend with a frown. “You should've helped her out! I _know_ you've got a healing Persona on you!”

“Skull is right.” Fox cut down another enemy as he frowned at his boyfriend. “We have to take care of each other in battle!”

“I'm fine everyone…” Noir stood, trying to calm the others down, though she frowned at Joker. “I'm sure he has his reasons.”

“Doesn't make it okay…” Panther huffed as she smacked a Midnight Queen in the face with her whip. “Ugh…!”

Joker didn't seem to care about their words as he continued to destroy the beings around him. He was absorbed in the battle, reveling in the power of gave him. The power he didn't have against the oppressive adults in his life.

“We should head back after this!” Mona let out a yell. “This is more than usual, I don't think we'll be able to handle more.”

“Agreed!” Queen turned to the group in a moment of respite. “I just hope Joker agrees.”

\--

The next day, Ren showed literally no worry about the fact they needed rest. In fact, he tried to push the group to go _again_ , stating there was nothing else that needed to be done. He’d made sure to go buy the fresh supplies that had been discussed that night and he didn’t have anything important coming up, anyway.

That was worrying to hear from him, seeing as he almost _always_ had something planned. In fact, Morgana knew he had plans with the others for the next week! And no way was he getting out of that.

“Joker, we can go in a week. Right now we all need rest and you need to keep your appointments!”

“Appointments?” Ren frowned at him. “What…?”

“Well, today you and Ryuji are going to the gym!” Morgana made sure his voice was as matter-of-fact as possible.

Ren blinked slowly. “Oh, yeah. Right.”

Morgana sighed as Ren made his way down the stairs. He wished Ryuji luck with Ren today, he was gonna need it.

As soon as Ren came into view, Ryuji grinned and held up a hand. “Hey dude. Ready to go get some training in?”

“Ah yeah…” He adjusted his bag. “Protein Lovers Gym, right?”

“Right! It'll be good to stretch our muscles in the real world too…” He grinned as he rolled his shoulder. “Besides, it's been a while since it was just you and me.”

Ren scratched his cheek. “That's true… I'm just not sure. Will this really help with the Metaverse?”

Ryuji gave him a look. “Well, duh. It's not like we can rely on just our Personas or something. We gotta keep our bodies strong!”

“Fair enough, I guess I just wanted to--”

“Wanted to use that… Nya-nya-step Persona more or something?” Ryuji rose an eyebrow.

“It's _Nyarlathotep,_ but yeah. It's super strong, so I need to make sure I've got complete control over it.” Ren felt that made sense, and if anyone would agree with him it would be his best friend Ryuji.

Ryuji gave Ren a pointed look. “Are you kidding me? Dude, you were amazing with it! It was crazy, I mean… How did you even do all that stuff?”

“I just… Kinda did, I guess?” Ren couldn't explain it. “If we go back, though, maybe I can--”

Ryuji held up a hand and shook his head. “Nuh-uh, no way! We're gonna go to the gym today. Just the gym.”

Ren frowned, looked like his best friend _wouldn’t_ understand. “Suit yourself.”

Ryuji stuck out his tongue before turning and heading for the door. “Trust me, I'd rather exercise without havin’ to kill Shadows every couple of minutes.”

Ren followed after Ryuji quietly. Looked like no matter what, it was to the gym with them. Usually, Ren wouldn't mind, but damn… He did. Well, maybe he'd end up enjoying it in the end, couldn't hurt to try.

Soon enough, they were at the gym and Ryuji turned to him with a grin and thumbs up. “Let’s get goin’, dude!”

Ren nodded and followed him into the changing room. Things started to go by in a blur for a while, then. They changed, moved to the main part of the gym, and got to work. Ren was pretty sure they helped each other stretch during that time, and that Ryuji suggested the treadmills…

But things didn’t _really_ make any sort of impact on him until he tripped on said treadmill, falling face first onto it. He slid off it, hissing in pain as he went and just laid there for a while. Ryuji eventually noticed, jumping off his own treadmill to come to Ren’s aid.

“Whoa! Are you okay?” Ryuji pulled him up slowly, a frown on his face. “That looks like it must’ve hurt.”

“It hurt a lot…” Ren rubbed his nose with a frown. “I guess I wasn’t paying much attention to what I was doing.”

Ryuji sighed, slapping him on the back. “That’s your problem, man! You need to pay attention… Didn’t think I’d need to tell you that, though. You usually take this kinda stuff seriously.”

“Sorry, I just can’t focus on much today…” He took off his glasses and began cleaning them (they might be fake, but they were hard to see through when dirty). “Maybe I should just go home.”

Ryuji said nothing for a moment, staring at his feet. “Maybe… Try and be better about it tomorrow, though, man. Ann might not take as well to you spacing out on her.”

“Tomorrow…?” That was right, he plans to go get crepes with Ann. “Ah, yeah.”

Ryuji shook his head, letting out a sigh. “Dude…”

\--

_Ren saw the man from his dream again, sitting in front of him with a smile on his face. The memories of the dream, no, the nightmare, came flooding back to him as he and Takahisa stared at each other._

_“What’s happening?”_

_“...All I can do is tell you to keep your friends close, they_ could _be salvation for you. Salvation I never had.”_

_“What do you mean?”_

And then he woke up.

 

\--

Ren almost wanted to cancel on Ann when he woke up the next morning. He’d startled awake feeling scared at _least_ three times last night and he couldn’t remember all of the one dream that led to that…

Being exhausted would make their friendly crepe date anything but fun, after all.

“Ren!” Shit, she was here already? Looked like cancelling wasn't gonna be a choice. “Are you up yet?!”

“Yeah, yeah!” He grabbed his bag, patting Morgana’s head on the way down. “Let's go get those crepes.”

He could sleep in the way there, maybe. If he was lucky enough to get a seat, that was.

Ann frowned as soon as she saw him, arms crossed against her chest. “Did you sleep at all last night?”

“I did, just not well.” He scratched his cheek sheepishly.

“Then… You go right to bed after we get these crepes, okay?!”

Ren frowned, he'd rather go back to bed right now. Oh well, he was sure grabbing crepes wouldn't be too intensive and if he said that he would be getting an earful. “Okay.”

The two of them made for the door then, Ann placing a hand on Ren’s arm. They made their way to the trains without too much issue (if Ren wanting to collapse where he stood didn’t count) and, thank god, there were empty seats.

“Let’s go sit and chat!” Ann grabbed him by the arm dragged him to the seats. “Like… Oh! Shiho messaged me today. She’s doing well in her new school and--”

Ren slid down in his seat, pulling his hood over his head more with a sigh. Hopefully it’d come across as him trying to make sure no one saw who he was and not like him trying to go to sleep. He was sure Ann would be upset should she realize he was trying to sleep through her endless chattering.

“So what do you think?” Ann pushed his shoulder with a smile. “Think when this is all done you'd wanna go see Shiho’s new school with me?”

“Huh?” He jumped a bit. “Uh… Don't think so.”

Ann frowned. “Okay… Guess you decided you didn’t care as much about Shiho’s recovery after all? You were always asking me how you could support her…”

Ren shrugged. “Things change… There’s sure to be more troubles to deal with after Shido, anyway.”

“What do you mean?” Ann crossed her arms. “I mean, I guess Mementos for Morgana… But besides that? I can’t think of anything.”

“It’s just a…” Ren paused for a moment. “A feeling, I guess?”

“If you say so.” Ann didn’t hide the fact she was far from convinced as she stood up. “Come on, we’re at our stop.”

Ren followed after her and at that point things kind of fell into a pattern. Ann would say something to try and get Ren excited or pumped or planning future hangouts… And Ren would shut them all down. He just wasn’t really feeling the idea of hanging out much, not anymore.

Basically all he did at this point was hang out with people, after all. He’d had so many deals to keep up with, so maybe it was natural he got burnt out on that. Besides, all the deals had been completed by now, so there was no reason for extra time spent with any of them…

“Here’s your crepe.” Ann handed it to him with a frown. “You wouldn’t tell me what kind you wanted, so I went with double chocolate.”

“Thanks.” Ren took it with a small nod, nibbling at it. “Sorry, Ann. I just don’t think I’m feeling all of this today.”

Ann let out a frustrated huff. “You’re telling me.”

Ren rubbed the back of his neck. “I’ll make it up to you… Later.” Much later.

“Don’t even worry about it.” Ann spun a strand of her hair around her finger. “You’re tired, right? I can’t hold you being a little grumpy because of that against you, especially since I dragged you out here.”

Ren didn’t say anything, seeing as he couldn’t argue with what she said. In fact, he mostly found himself agreeing, which he doubted Ann would want to hear. “At least we got our crepes.”

“Yeah.” Ann took a large bite out of hers. “That’s a plus, at least.”

\--

_“Maybe no friends will work out better for you than it did for me.” The first thing Ren heard in his dream that night was Takahisa’s voice._

_They were in that room again, only this time Ren was sitting as well, across from the man who claimed to be his uncle’s half brother. He wanted so badly to say something, but any words that came to mind were caught in his throat. This was all so terrifying, nightmares he only remembered when having another one… What could he do?_

_“After all, friendship can’t always save you.” Takahisa continued to speak as if Ren wasn’t sitting in front of him. “It can cause just as many issues as loneliness, if that boy was anything to go by.”_

_“What boy?”_

His eyes snapped open.

 

\--

“Thank you for coming to help me with gardening, Ren-kun!” Haru’s smile was big and bright when Ren snuck his way onto the roof of the school.

He had slept much better than the night before, only startling awake with no memories of his nightmare once. That meant more actual sleep had happened and, seeing as he’d gone to bed hours earlier, he was feeling more rested. Didn’t mean he wanted to be here, though.

No, he felt less and less interested in spending time with the others by the day. There was more important things to do… Shido was at large and they should be working towards making sure they were ready for him, not spending their days doing nothing.

He guessed at least Haru’s vegetables would be useful.

“No problem… Someone had to do it.” And it looked like that someone was unfortunately him.

“Ah… yes.” Haru gave a nervous laugh before leading him to the flowerbeds. “Well, this is where we’re working today. The tomatoes just need time to finish so we shouldn’t disturb them too much.”

“Got it…” Ren glanced at the tomatoes as he began tending to the soil. “How long until they’re ready?”

“Oh, not too long! Tomorrow or the next day, I think. I can bring them to Leblanc since I know you have plans with Yusuke and and Mako-chan the next few--” Haru cut herself off with a gasp, gripping Ren’s arm. “Stop! You’re going to kill that flower!”

He blinked, looking down at his hand. It looked like he had been just about ready to rip one away from its roots. That was weird, he didn’t remember even moving to do that, but here he was. And he only felt sorta bad about it.

“Sorry, I guess I wasn’t paying attention.” He pulled his hand away and rubbed the back of his neck. “I was paying more attention to the tomatoes.”

Haru let out a sigh. “Ren-kun, you’re usually so much better about this. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, nothing.” Ren shook his head. “I’m just not really in the mood to garden, I guess, but we had this planned so I came.”

“Go home, then.” She turned back to the flowers, doing her best to salvage the damaged flower. “I’ll call Ann-chan and ask her to come instead. You should focus on feeling better for your date tomorrow.”

Ren had never seen the third year so upset and it was frankly terrifying. She was smiling still, sure, but the coldness in her voice couldn’t be missed. He didn’t even want to attempt to act like he wanted to try again if she sounded like that… If she wanted him gone, then fine.

“Hope your girlfriend can come help you, then.”

“Thank you.”

As Ren walked away from the tense atmosphere, a black butterfly fluttered past. That was odd, he'd never seen those around here.

 

\--

_He was in the room again, confused and disoriented. He kept dreaming of Takahisa for some reason and couldn’t even figure out why… Hard to do when he couldn’t remember the dreams the moment his eyes opened._

_Maybe if he could force himself to stay in the dream longer he would learn something, remember at least a name. If he at least had that, he could start piecing together what was going on._

_“You’re trying to find a way to remember this, aren’t you?” Takahisa sighed. “It’s too bad for you, you won’t remember anything the Crawling Chaos doesn’t want you to.”_

_Ren opened his mouth to ask just who the Crawling Chaos was, if it was the same as his Persona when…_

He shot up in bed, fully awake.

 

\--

Yusuke and Ren were spending more time together at the museum once again. Usually Ren would be pretty excited about that, ready to see what art was exciting Yusuke that day, but today he just felt numb to it all. Maybe the shakey sleep schedule was starting to get to him. Waking up at least once a night couldn’t be healthy, after all.

Yusuke was currently going on and on about a painting in front of them and Ren couldn’t say he was picking up one word. Yusuke’s rambling was getting on his nerves in a way it never had before… He must’ve just been grumpy.

“And that's why I will aim for a similar style in my next piece!” Yusuke looked at him with a dazzling smile. The smile made him sick.

“I see. The art is…” He looked up at the piece with a frown. “Different than what you usually do. Do you really think you could pull it off?”

Yusuke blinked a few times, the shock of his boyfriend’s words hitting him like a punch in the gut. “It _is_ different than my usual style, yes, but I thought attempting it would be alright. I need to stretch my artistic muscles, after all.”

“I guess, but what’s the point?” Ren tilted his head to the side. “It’s not like you’ve mastered your style yet. Should you really be trying other ones?”

Yusuke frowned, crossing his arms. “I was told by my teachers to try and attempt to let it develop at this age, so I thought I would try to mimic a few and see what I enjoy from them…”

“I think that’s a dumb idea.” Ren didn’t know why, but he couldn’t keep the words in. Words he’d usually have kept to himself, if he were to some reason think them…

Strange.

Yusuke crossed his arms. “I see… Maybe I won’t attempt it, then.”

Yusuke turned on his heel and walked away with a mumbled ‘excuse me’ and a pained expression on his face. Ren knew he had upset Yusuke, but what could he do? His filter wasn’t working correctly… Or more it was things he would usually bury came out instead of the nicer things he wanted to say. If that kept up, it would just get worse.

Maybe he would text an apology to his phone later, when he could take an hour to make sure it was worded properly… Buy him some of those snacks he liked, too.

He just hoped this wouldn’t affect their relationship too badly or anything.

\--

_“What’s the Crawling Chaos? Is it related to my new Persona?” Ren wasted no time asking Takahisa as soon as he realized he was back in the dream again. Maybe if he was fast enough, he could get an answer this time… An answer he could will himself to remember._

_Takahisa sighed. “Even if I tell you, it won’t be remembered long enough for you to remember anything.”_

_“But I need to do something! It’s starting to affect how I interact with my friends and my--”_

_“Boyfriend? That was embarrassing.” Takahisa shook his head. “It’s too bad there’s nothing I can do to help you.”_

_“But--”_

“I need your help!”

\--

After standing in the rows of books, looking at nothing for an hour, Ren felt Makoto could’ve come to the bookstore by her damn self. She had said she wanted someone there to watch her back while she looked for some rare book about the making of Buchimaru…

When Ren had made the plan earlier that week he’d been happy to offer his help, but now? Now he was regretting it with every fiber of his being. Pointless… That’s what this was, absolutely pointless!

“Finally found it and bought it.” Makoto walked up to him, a small smile on her face as she held it up. “Thanks for coming with me.”

“Ask your little girl friend Eiko to bring you next time.” He didn’t even pause to think about if he should say it or not. “She definitely likes Buchimaru more than I ever would.”

Makoto blinked a few times, trying to register exactly what was just said to her. “But you said you would be happy to come with me…”

“I was just saying that so you didn’t feel like a bother.” He frowned down at her, arms crossed against his chest. “Maybe I should’ve spoke my mind though.”

“Ren…”

“Buchimaru is for little kids Makoto, you really should grow up some.” Without another word, he turned on his heel and walked out of shop.

He could hear Makoto stuttering as she tried to process what was said and tried to think of what to say. Too bad for her she wouldn’t be able to say it to his face. He would be about halfway to the station by the time she had thought of something--

He came to a stop, hand on his head. What the hell was that about? Why had he talked to Makoto like that…? He would never say that kind of thing to his friends usually and, well, he felt he’d been worse than he had the day before with Yusuke.

Ren made a mental note to send an even longer apology text to Makoto than the one he’d sent Yusuke… Maybe try and find some super rare Buchimaru merch to buy and send her too, to make sure she didn’t hate him over this.

Ren let out a groan as a black butterfly fluttered by. “I’m messing up big time…”

\--

_Ren wanted to cry when he saw Takahisa again. At this point he was sure seeing this man meant things were about to get a lot worse. Was he going to end up hurting a friend next? He knew Futaba and he had plans and the thought of doing this to that girl terrified him._

_“Please, tell me how to make this stop!” He grabbed at Takahisa’s jacket, words desperate. “There has to be something you can do to help me.”_

_Takahisa sighed, shaking his head. “You have to fight it yourself boy, there’s nothing I can do until you at least do that.”_

_“No, no… Please… I…”_

“I need you to help me!”

\--

Ren hadn’t gone downstairs to meet Futaba like planned and, honestly, he hoped she wouldn’t come up and try to drag him down. After the Makoto and Yusuke events he felt like he needed to be by himself for a while… He didn’t want to hurt anyone else.

But too bad for him, Futaba was getting more courageous, marching right up into his little attic room like it was nothing. He needed to bring himself to just tell her to go away, say he wasn’t feeling up to it. One little sentence was all he needed…

“Ren, get up! You said you’d take me to Akihabara today!” Futaba sat next to him on his bed with a frown. “Don’t tell me you forgot!”

 _I’m not feeling up to it, sorry._ “How the hell did a NEET like you get brave enough to just walk into a guy’s room?”

Futaba blinked a few times, confusion overcoming her features. “What? Why are you bringing that up now, Ren?!”

“Why?” Ren sat up with a scoff. “Because if you can do that, you should be able to go buy your stupid game on your damn own.”

Futaba basically sprung onto her feet, holding her hands close to her chest. “What’s wrong with you?! If you don’t want to take me to get Air of the Wilderness just say so! You don’t have to be a jerk about it.”

“I’m not even being a jerk. Maybe you should go back to hiding in your room if you can’t handle me saying something as soft as that.”

Futaba’s lower lip quivered, her eyes welled with tears, and she ran down the stairs at lightning speed. Ren didn’t even feel bad this time and, well, he didn’t know if that was a bad or a good thing anymore.

He laid back down, letting out a breath as he thought on it. He wanted to at least figure out if this was for the best or not. He was getting more comfortable speaking his mind, he guessed? But he supposed it was a little mean, too, which wasn’t good…

“What do I do about this…?”

Footsteps alerted him to someone else joining him in the room. He turned his head to the side, expecting to see Futaba again, but no. It was Sojiro, looking more than a little pissed (probably about how Ren had talked to his daughter).

“What in the hell is wrong with you?”

Ah. Ren had a feeling this wouldn’t go over well.

\--

_“It’s getting worse, isn’t it?” Takahisa spoke to Ren as soon as his eyes opened in his dream. “Don’t worry, he’s sure to make it seem better before everything dips into chaos.”_

_Ren frowned, hugging himself. “Nothing you say ever tells me more about my situation. Are you enjoying watching me struggle like this?!”_

_“Not at all.” A frown came to his face. “I just know there’s nothing a dead man can do for you.”_

_“Then why keep showing up in my dreams? If you can’t help me, go away!”_

_“I’m not the one doing it boy. That Persona of yours is toying with you.” A swing of sake taken. “I’ll stop appearing when he gets bored of this.”_

_“And when will he get bored? When?!”_

Ren awoke with the word _soon_ ringing through his head.

\--

“Just spending today inside, huh?” Morgana sat next to Ren as the boy stared at the floor. “Maybe we could talk some…”

“Why would I want to talk? Don’t you think I’m staying inside for a reason?” Ren frowned at the not-cat, arms crossed against his chest.

“I just thought you might want to. You had to text apology messages to Yusuke _and_ Makoto, and yesterday Boss had to force to apologize to Futaba…” Morgana sighed. “You seem really off. Is there something on your mind?”

“No, and even if there was it wouldn’t matter.” Ren glared down at Morgana. “Not like I’d feel the need to run off because someone hurts my feelings over it.”

Morgana’s ears slicked back. “There’s no need to bring that up right now. I feel bad enough doing that to you guys already…”

He scoffed. “Do you really? You don’t seem to feel bad!”

“I do feel bad…!” Morgana stood straight, though a tail between his legs and his ears against his head told Ren all he needed to know. He wasn’t nearly as ready to argue this as he wanted his voice to make him think.

“Then maybe show it more, you pathetic brat!” Ren stood up, his voice raising. “I’m so tired of taking care of you and dealing with you acting like you know so much about everything! It’s annoying!”

“That’s enough!” Sojiro’s voice pulled Ren out of his yelling. “You’re bothering the customers! ...And yelling at your cat, really?”

Sojiro walked over to Morgana, picking him up. “Futaba’s downstairs… I’m giving him to her to watch until you straighten up a bit.”

“Fine by me. I don’t want to see his stupid face right now, anyway.”

Sojiro frowned at Ren. “You need to straighten your act up before you do something you regret and I kick you out. You’re getting a free pass while we wait for all this Phantom Thieves business to wrap up… But when that’s done, you’ll be in deep trouble if you act like this.”

“By the time all of this is over, I’ll probably be heading home.”

Sojiro looked like he wanted to say something, but all he did was sigh and walk for the stairs, grumbling something about Ren being too cocky for his situation. It almost reminded Ren of when he first got here… Fine by him. He didn’t need to be worried about playing family with Sojiro, Futaba, and Morgana anyway.

\--

“We seriously need to talk about Ren.” Ryuji wasted no time sitting on Futaba’s bed when he got to the unofficial group meeting without the leader of the Phantom Thieves. “He was actin’ off when we went to the gym! Didn’t pay attention to what he was doing and just wanted to go back to Mementos…”

“That’s not even mentioning the fact he suddenly stopped caring about Shiho and her recovery!” Ann frowned. “He didn’t care all when I told him about her on our way to get crepes. Didn’t wanna hang out with me and her, either.”

“And he almost killed a flower… The poor thing isn’t doing well right now.” Haru gave a concerned look to the group. “He’s always been so careful before that… And he was so curt about it when I told him to go home…”

“He’s also become less supportive of my painting…” Yusuke hugged himself with a pained frown. “He apologized for it later, but he seemed to believe what he was saying at the museum.”

“It was the same with me. His apology text didn’t even seem genuine, if I’m being honest with you…” Makoto shook her head. “It was like he was doing it because he felt he had to, not because he wanted to.”

“I _know_ he had to when Sojiro made him apologize to me…” Futaba sniffled. “H-he even glared at me when he was done… And today he yelled at Mona and Sojiro said Ren didn’t even care he’d been doing it…”

“Whatever’s going on with Joker… It’s bad.” Morgana sighed as he sat in Futaba’s lap. “That’s why I asked Futaba to message you all. We need to figure out what to do about this.”

“Maybe it’s the Shido stuff getting to him?” Ann tilted her head to the side with a frown. “We basically ran in as soon as we could before deciding to take a break… He might not be feeling great about the break.”

“That’s a good point.” Haru nodded in agreement with her girlfriend. “He might be afraid we’ll need another break and not finish all that needs to be done before the deadline hits.”

“I suppose it’s possible he’s speaking his mind more now that he’s on edge…” Yusuke put a hand to his chin as he hummed. “Being upset makes it hard to think about how your words are affecting others.”

“Should we chalk it all up to the Palace stuff, then?” Ryuji tapped the ground with his foot. “I mean, we’re gonna go deal with that tomorrow, so…”

“It might be a good idea to keep an eye on Ren for a while after we’re done, actually.” Makoto brushed a lock of hair behind her ear. “In case there ends up being more to it.”

“Agreed.” Futaba nodded. “We can’t write it off as just the Palace or anything!”

“That’s true, but…” Morgana sighed, not exactly happy about the conclusion he’d come to. “We’re going to have to put Joker on the backburner for now. The Palace needs to come first and if he doesn’t start going back to normal, we ask someone… Especially about his new Persona.”

“What about Nya-nya-step do we need to ask about?”

“ _Nyarlathotep,_ Ryuji.” Morgana rolled his eyes. “And I don’t know, exactly. Something about it just gives me a bad feeling, so looking into it might be a good idea.”

“Nyarlathotep is a being of Lovecraftian origins.” Yusuke began to speak. “I believe it is some sort of Outer God.”

“That so?” Makoto sighed. “I don’t know much about Lovecraft, but that seems like it could be bad, if that ends up reflecting on Ren’s psyche.”

Haru sighed. “I can’t help but have a bad feeling about all of this…”

 

\--

 

_Takahisa sighed as Ren came to in the dream again. He almost seemed disappointed in Ren this time… And Ren couldn’t figure out why that would be the case. He hadn’t ever come across like that before…_

_“It’s too bad…” Takahisa gave a disappointed shake of his head. “I thought you would be able to fight it if you tried. You don’t have the sheer will of Reiji to protect yourself from Nyarlathotep, but you do have his stubbornness…”_

_“What does Uncle Reiji have to do with any of this? Nyarlothotep is a Persona, Uncle Reiji doesn’t even have one…!”_

_Takahisa chuckled and shook his head. “I would explain, but there’s no point. You’re already at the point of no return… Or you will be if you don’t make the right choice with that traitor of yours.”_

Ren woke up, Goro Akechi on his mind.

\--

They had made it back into Shido’s Palace the following day, starting to put things behind them. Ren was acting a bit weird, sure, but they were sure it was just their friend feeling off… This Palace was one he had a personal stake in, after all.

The group had thought that for a long while as they explored… And then Goro Akechi had revealed himself. He had revealed how he felt, made himself go berserk, fought the Thieves and lost… And Shido’s cognition of Goro had appeared before them.

Goro had just shot his own cognition, someone with his own face, and followed it up by shooting a button. The Thieves were stunned for a moment, Oracle questioning just what it was as it lifted up and blocked them away from the other.

Skull slammed his fists against the bulkhead door as things began to make sense in his head. “Akechi!”

Goro’s voice came from the other side as Skull continued to slam his hands against the door. “Hurry up and go.”

“You fool!” Fox took a step forward, a clear disregard for what Goro had just told them. “Are you trying to get yourself killed?!”

“The real fools…” Goro paused, taking a deep breath on the other side of the door. “Are you guys. You should have just abandoned me here a long time ago. You would have all perished… if you had tried to face these with me weighing you down…”

He broke into a coughing fit, one full of pain and injury. His wounds were definitely beginning to take their toll… And there he was, alone with his cognitive self and Shadows just waiting to pounce. There was no way he would be able to make it out of that alive.

Queen took a step forward. “Akechi-kun, please…!”

“Let’s make a deal… Okay?” He ignored Queen, his attention clearly now on Joker. “You won’t say no… will you?”

Fox grimaced. “Why at a time like this…!?”

“Change Shido’s heart… in my stead…” Goro continued on. “End his crimes… Please…!”

Joker stared at the bulkhead door for a moment. “I promise.”

Goro’s bond with Joker could practically be felt in that moment. The Detective Prince truly believed in Joker taking this over in his stead... An unbreakable bond.

One that Joker couldn’t care less about.

“You bastard…!” A voice that sounded like Goro’s rang through the bulkhead again, but angrier, emptier… It must have been his cognitive self, regaining composure.

“So, my final enemy is a puppet version of myself…” The real Goro chuckled. “Not bad.”

Noir held her hands to her chest, worry overcoming her features. Worry for the boy who had killed her father. “Akechi-kun!”

Panther turned to Mona, desperation clear in her eyes. “Isn’t there some way to get this open, Mona…?”

Before Mona could reply, two gunshots rang out in quick succession. Almost everyone’s face twisted in a look of worry and sorrow… All of them except for Joker, whose expression remained blank.

“His signal is... gone…” Oracle’s voice was weak. “I’m only getting… the weaklings…”

Panther looked down, tears in her eyes. “No…”

Joker couldn’t keep him thoughts to himself anymore, turning to look at the others with a frown. “I don’t get it. I thought you all hated him.”

“Joker…?” Noir frowned. “He did… Horrible things, things I will never forgive. But I could sympathize with him. And even if I couldn’t, someone losing their life like that… it’s…”

“It’s horrible!” Skull snapped, turning to look at Joker. “You should know that. You were the one guy who seemed to like hanging out with him.”

“Skull has a point. You always seemed to talk about him pleasantly…” Fox paused. “Or as pleasantly as one could talk about someone ready to betray us.”

“Maybe I realized he’s not worth any worry or any tears.” Joker shrugged, the frown still on his face. “He killed people you love and got in our way, after all.”

“He’s… Still a human life, Joker. And there’s ways for people like him to atone without losing his life as well.” Queen shook her head. “I thought you would understand that, if anyone would.”

Joker thought for a moment. Would he be the one to understand that? He wasn’t really quite sure he believed that… It wasn’t his problem if Goro chose to go out like this, chose to ‘atone’ by giving them an escape. He had bigger things to focus on than pitying his foolish choices.

“...Let’s go.” He shrugged, not truly giving Queen a reply as he walked away from the engine room. “We have more important things to worry about, there’s a calling card to send, after all.”

“I-I see…!” Mona spoke up as he followed after Joker. “Joker is just hiding his pain, everyone! He’s focusing on the promise he just made to Akechi--”

“Don’t put words into my mouth, annoying cat.” Joker looked to Mona, sneering. “I just wanted to get him to shut up and do what he had to, already.”

“Joker…” Noir gasped, hand covering her mouth. “What’s gotten into you?!”

“I’m just learning what needs to be focused on and what doesn’t.” He rolled his eyes and continued on. “If you don’t agree, feel free to just leave, okay? I’ll take care of the rest of this on my own if I have to.”

The rest of the Thieves looked at each other. There was definitely bad… There was no way this was all just linked to Joker’s issues with Shido. But what else could it be…? Was Morgana onto something with the Persona thing…?

“Let’s just go for now, I don’t think leaving him alone is a good idea.” Fox started off after him.

“Just promise we’ll figure out what’s wrong with him when we’re done with this Palace, Inari?” Oracle grabbed him by the sleeve, clearly worried about the boy.

Fox looked at the rest of the group and they all nodded in unison. “Promise.”

 

\--

They had done it, they had brought down Shido and Joker was revelling in it. The man who had ruined his life was grovelling in front of him now… Well, it wasn’t the exact man, but it _was_ all the nastiest parts of him. The nastiest parts that, if killed, would kill the real deal.

 _Why not kill him?_ The thought came to Joker’s mind and it wasn’t something he could ignore.

Usually he wouldn’t have any issues ignoring that, wanting to lash out at the man who destroyed his life would be natural, but not something he would act on. But right now? He wasn’t in the state of mind he was usually in.

Words and statements he would never speak were spoken, and it was just a matter of time before that bled into actions. Why not let it bleed into it when he had the chance to get rid of such a monster? Manipulating everyone from him to that pitiful fool Goro to the rotten adults around him… He deserved it, right?

He pointed his gun at Shido’s Shadow, a grin coming to his face at the thought of getting rid of him. Freedom from so much pain he’d had to endure with just the pull of a trigger…!

The other Phantom Thieves began to yell. Fox and Skull trying to pull his hand away from its perfect shot, Noir and Oracle begging him to not do that, to not become just like Goro when he had them there to protect him, Panther and Queen moving between him and the Shadow (as if that would stop him if he really tried)... And Mona grabbing the treasure.

Not one of them was willing to let this end in death and, honestly, it pissed Joker off. He wanted to take it farther, Shido had so much blood on his hands that he would _deserve_ it… No one had tried to stop Panther when she nearly killed Kamoshida, so why was _he_ being stopped?!

It wasn’t fair, it wasn’t _fair, it wasn’t fair!_

He ripped his hand free from the other boys, prepared to shoot Panther and Queen down to get to Shadow Shido if he had to… And then things started going downhill quickly. Shido’s Shadow disappeared and the Palace began to fall apart.

If only he had been a little faster…

\--

After escaping the destruction of Shido’s Palace, ‘beating’ Ryuji for a death scare, and crying at Sojiro for something similar, Futaba and Morgana rushed back to where Ryuji had been left. Thankfully, Ren either hadn’t caught on to the fact Ryuji hadn’t really gotten beaten, or he didn’t care…

That worked for them.

Futaba and Morgana were the last ones to make it back to the spot, the others all already standing around. No one looked comfortable and, well, it was hard to blame any of them. Something was horribly wrong with Ren and they didn’t know what.

“So….” Futaba finally spoke and the others jumped. “What are we gonna do about Ren…?”

Makoto sighed, arms crossed tightly across her chest. “I’m not sure. He’s become so… So…”

“Unhinged.” Yusuke crossed his arms as the word let his mouth. “There’s something very wrong with him.”

“Yeah…” Ryuji stood from the pole he’d been sitting against. “Ren would never act like that.”

“You’re right. I’d never seen him so close to killing someone before…” Ann’s voice was quiet. “I haven’t seen any of us even consider it since Kamoshida…”

“It’s been that long…?” Haru frowned. “That’s… Bad. If that hasn’t even been considered since you all started…”

“I think we should do some research, then.” Morgana spoke up. “Find out if there’s anything about him that could cause this, or if it’s that Persona we need to worry about.”

“Good idea, but where do we start?” Makoto put a hand on he hip. “Do we try and find family members of his to talk to?”

“I can do that!” Futaba jumped in. “It shouldn’t take me long to find numbers and even addresses if they live close enough to hunt down.”

“That’s fine and all…” Ryuji rubbed the back of his head. “But won’t it seem weird to randomly ask them and stuff? And if they ask what’s going on, it’s not like we can just tell them about Personas!”

“Ryuji is right. We would run the risk of making his family think we’re crazy if we’re not careful about it.” Yusuke frowned. “Perhaps only those who work well under pressure should do the questioning of his family.”

“I can do it, then.” Haru put a hand to her chest. “I can make the calls and visits.”

“Haru-chan, that’d be so much for just you!” Ann grabbed her hand with a frown. “I’ll help! I might not be the best actress, but I can at least help figure out who to call and when!”

“I’ll be fine, Ann-chan.” Haru smiled at her. “I want to be able to help, and I know I can do it!”

“I think we should all help you out.” Makoto took a step towards the others. “Futaba-chan can look up the information and I can sort through it and send the most likely to be helpful ones to you two.”

“And then I can help figure out who to call first!” Ann grinned. “And Haru-chan can do the rest!”

“Would you guys be okay with us leavin’ it to you, then?” Ryuji rubbed the back of his neck. “Yusuke and I aren't really the most subtle with stuff and Mona is, y’know…”

“That’s fine!” Ann gave him a thumbs up and a grin. “Us girls have got this!”

“Thank you.” Yusuke gave her a smile. “I wish I could do more, he is my boyfriend, after all…”

“Don’t worry, Inari! He’ll be back to going along with your weirdness soon enough!” Futaba snickered, a grin on her face.

“And the same will be said for you.”

“What’s that supposed to mean, huh?!”

“Futaba-chan, Yusuke…” Haru cleared her throat and stepped between the two. “While I’m glad you’re both still feeling up to your sibling-like bickering, but can we please focus? We should get started as soon as possible!”

“Agreed!” Morgana nodded. “In fact, I’d say we should consider our deadline for Shido’s change of heart to be the deadline for figuring out what’s going on with Ren, too.”

“S-sorry…!” Futaba swallowed hard and shrunk a bit. “But that’s a good idea. The sooner we figure this out, the better.”

“Then let’s all head home and get started.” Makoto nodded. “We don’t have time to waste.”

“Right!”

\--

Morgana was nervous to go back to Leblanc, but he didn’t have much choice. It turned out Sojiro had some allergy problems when Morgana hung around his living space. It sucked, but… He couldn't stay with Futaba until this was all fixed.

“Morgana.” Ren frowned at the not-cat as he jumped in the window. “Didn’t think you’d be coming back, thought you ran off to stay with Futaba.”

Morgana swallowed hard as Ren stared him down. “U-uh… Well… I was going to, but some stuff came up so I can’t!”

“Oh?” Ren tilted his head to the side, arms crossed. “And what’s that?”

Morgana froze, shit. He had been hoping Ren would leave it alone… Sure, Morgana had a reason right there that he could use, but… Could he make it sound right? He wasn’t sure. He could tell the truth, he could lie… But how could would his half-truth go over.

“I guess Chief has an allergy that only acts up when he’s around my fur a lot.” Morgana jumped into the room, trying to act casual. “Futaba told me I couldn’t stay with them because of that.”

Ren let out a sigh, leaning against the wall next to his bed. “Too bad, I was looking forward to more time away from you.”

“You know, I could say the same thing.” Morgana stuck out his tongue at Ren. “It doesn’t matter, though. We should try and go to bed, you’re sure to be tired.”

“You and your nagging me to go to bed.” Ren scoffed. “If anything, I’m tired of that!”

“Not my fault the Metaverse is tiring!” Morgana jumped up onto the desk they used for lockpick making. “I just want to make sure you get your sleep… I bet you’d sleep on your own without me here!”

“It wouldn’t be annoying if I told myself to go to bed, you dumb cat.”

“I am _not_ a cat! You should know that by now!” Morgana could feel himself getting more upset, but no… He couldn’t let that happen. Now wasn’t the time… He needed to choose his battles. “Whatever, I’m going to bed.”

He watched Ren curl into his bed. “Fine by me. Don’t bother me again tonight, got it?”

“...Got it.” Morgana curled up himself an closed his eyes tightly. What was wrong with Ren…?

 

\--

“Okay!” Ann jumped off Haru’s bed as a message came through on her laptop. “Makoto-chan is done sorting through all the names, numbers, and addresses Futaba-chan sent her!”

Haru turned to look at her with a smile. “Oh, that’s wonderful! We can get started soon, then! Would you like some help sorting out who I should call and visit when?”

“No way!” Ann shook her head. “I got this!”

“Ann-chan, will you be honest with me?”

“S-sure! What is it?”

“You're worried about Ren, aren't you?” Haru frowned. “Moreso than, well, probably everyone besides Yusuke and Mona-chan.”

Ann tried to give Haru a smile, but her lips quivered right into a frown under her girlfriend's watchful eye. Hard to get one past Haru, especially when one wasn't very good at acting.

“I-I wouldn't say more than anyone else, but…” Ann put her face in her hands. “He reminds me of myself when I almost killed Kamoshida. And it's scary, I know what kind of rage you have to have to feel like that and… And…”

“Ann-chan--”

“And I know it's hard to control. If Ren keeps this up, I'm not sure what he'll do…” Ann collapsed onto the ground. “What if we can't help him?”

Haru made her way to Ann’s side, wrapping her arms around her. “It's going to be alright, Ann-chan. We're going to help Ren.”

Ann looked up at Haru, cheeks stained with tears. “Are you sure…?”

Haru nodded, kissing a stray tear away. “Absolutely. We just have to do our best, to make sure we don't fail!”

Ann stared at Haru for a moment, still teary-eyed. “Haru-chan… You're right! We have to keep our heads up! For Ren and for everyone else!”

Haru giggled, pulling Ann into a tight hug. “Exactly! That's the positive Ann-chan I know!”

Ann let out a laugh, rubbing her face against Haru’s as she returned the hug. “Thanks… I think I needed to hear that!”

“I'm always here when you need to hear anything, alright?” Haru pulled away, sending a beaming smile in Ann's direction. “But for now… Let's get to work!”

Ann stood up, wiping away the last of the water on her face. “Yeah! Let's do this.”

 

\--

 

Haru had made numerous phone calls. Only half had even answered, and none of them said anything useful. It was really starting to look like it was linked to the Persona of his…. But there was one more person to check with.

Research from Futaba had revealed an uncle of Ren's living in Tokyo. Reiji Kido was the last family member they could talk to, and Haru was hoping she could speak to him in person. She just had to hope he was home.

A knock on the door, Haru’s hands grasped in front of her. Something about this was so nerve-wracking… Maybe because it was the last chance for a clearer answer, maybe it was because it was happening in person… Haru wasn't sure, but she didn’t like it.

It opened and she sucked in a deep breath. She could do this.

“Hello?” The man at the door was definitely Reiji Kido, though he wasn't standing there alone.

A friend or maybe a lover? She wasn't quite sure who the man with an earring next to Reiji was to him… But she knew this conversation would do better if it was private.

“Uh, you're Reiji Kido, correct? Could I talk to you… Alone?” Haru kicked at the ground, forcing herself to keep eye contact with the man. “It's about your nephew, Ren Amamiya.”

Reiji blinked a few times, registering Haru’s words and seemingly something else (what, Haru wasn't sure). He looked to the other man looking on, putting a hand on the side of his face (definitely lovers, Haru guessed).

“I'll be back, Naoya.”

With that he stepped outside, still in what Haru guessed was his nightwear. He closed the door, turning to face Haru with crossed arms. She had to admit… He was a bit scary. She hoped this wouldn't turn out to be a mistake.

“What's this about my nephew?” Reiji spoke up, making Haru jump.

“I'm Ren-kun’s friend and, you see, recently some stressors have entered his life again.” Haru couldn't bring herself to look at him. “He's usually so kind and considerate, but… He's been so cold and rude recently! Is there anything you can think of from his past that'd cause that?”

Reiji scratched his cheek. “I can't think of anything about him specifically, no.”

“Then any family issues?”

“There's…. Something on my side of the family, but he's not blood-related to me.” Reiji grimaced. “So unless…”

Haru stepped forward, grabbing Reiji’s hands. “Do you know something that could help?!”

“...Maybe, but it depends on if Mot’s acting up for the reason I'm thinking.”

Haru blinked, head tilting to the side. “Mot…?” Wasn’t that the name of a Persona Ren had used once?

Reiji nodded, pointing to himself. “Yeah, that's my Persona.”

“Persona…?!” Haru’s voice came out as a gasped whisper. “There are others?”

“Well, sure. I know at least… Thirteen, maybe fourteen others.” Reiji shrugged. “They seem rarer nowadays, but back when I was a teen and a young adult, they were pretty commonplace.”

“T-then maybe you can help!” Her grip on his hands tightened. “Do you know anything about the Persona Nyarlathotep?”

As the name left her lips, Reiji paled. He went from a sturdy, intimidating figure to a shaking, scared one. He almost looked as if he was a scared child, facing off against the monster under his bed. Something about the name set him on edge and told Haru the Persona was at least part of (if not fully) the issue.

“Does Ren have Nyarlathotep?” His voice was as unsteady as his stance.

“Yes… Is that an issue?”

“It is most of the time…” Reiji covered his mouth. “I only know one person who used it and didn't end up messed up… And even then, the nightmares are…”

“Nightmares?”

“I used the Persona once. I've had nightmares from time to time ever since… Bad nightmares.” Reiji pulled his hands free from Haru. “And I was the lucky one.”

“What happened to others who used it…?” Haru was terrified to hear the answer, but she knew she needed to.

“Mostly death. After plenty of mind games…” Reiji bit his lip. “B-but maybe that's not why Ren's acting up. Have you asked Igor why he let him use it?”

Haru blinked. “I'm sorry… Who?”

“Igor, the master of the Velvet Room? The guy who lets you fuse more Persona to use?”

“I'm afraid I don't know what you're talking about.” Haru shook her head. “Only Ren uses more than one Persona…”

“Are you kidding me? Seems like it'll make it harder for everyone if you can't all…” Reiji shook his head. “No, I'm getting off topic. Anyway, you're saying you can't get to the Velvet Room?”

“I don't think I can, no.”

“Shit…” Reiji ran a hand through his hair, Haru tried to not stare when she noticed the scar. “Me and my friends have been locked out recently, too… So it's not like I can ask for you…”

“Then we can't be sure if it's the Persona or not…?” Was she going to have to tell the group they were back to square one?

“It'd probably be safe to guess that's what it is…” Reiji rubbed the back of his neck. “I just thought it'd be better to double check, if you could… You can't, though, so I suggest you trying to get him to let go of the Persona instead.”

Haru nodded, thinking. “...Is there anyway you can help with that?”

“It's pathetic, but I can't. I can't go kick up a fuss with Igor about it and… I can't stand the thought of going to see him. I've already seen one man die to that monster, seen worse in my dreams, I… I can't stand the thought of more than that.” Reiji wouldn't even look Haru in the eye. “I’m sorry.”

“It's fine, I can understand.” Haru gave him a smile. “I recently lost my father and I don't think I could stand to see another death like his. Is there… Anyway I could at least get your number? For moral support.”

Reiji looked at her, thinking for what felt like an hour. “Sure, it's probably the least I can do… Feels like this monster follows my family no matter what we do…”

Haru held up her phone as Reiji did the same. Numbers exchanged, she prepared to leave. “Well, if its following your family, I promise my friends and I will do what we can to get it away from Ren-kun!”

“...Thank you.”

 

\--

The Phantom Thieves had wasted no time jumping into action when Haru explained what she learned from Reiji. Nyarlathotep was proving dangerous, and they needed to do something about it. For now, all they could do was try and push him to get rid of the Persona… Hopefully it'd work.

“So, anyone wanna explain why you all pestered me to meet up down here?” Ren frowned, not realizing that Sae and Sojiro waited outside in case the fellow teens couldn't get to him.

“We're here to talk about Nyarlathotep.” Makoto wasted no time speaking up. “Ren, we have it on good authority that that Persona is no good for you.”

“Oh?” Ren smirked. “And whose authority would that be, huh?”

“Your uncle's, dude!” Ryuji didn't think before speaking. “Turns out he knows a lot about Personas, even uses ‘em!”

“So if he says Nyarlathotep is bad news, he's probably right!” Ann wasted no time jumping in.

“Yeah?” Ren rolled his eyes. “Which uncle is this? The one who smokes more than he thinks about his family? Or the one pretending to be a normal man when he used to be just as pathetic as Akechi?”

Judging by the look on Ren’s face, he hadn't even had the knowledge necessary for at least part of his quip. That just made everything that much more worrisome.

“Ren…” Futaba pulled her knees to her chin. “How did you know so much about your uncles…?”

“The way you're acting makes me think it wasn't something you already knew…” Morgana added. “And the only place I could see you getting that information from is from the Persona one of them used too.”

“No way!” Ren shook his head. “I just… know more than I realized! Childhood memories and…”

“Ren.” Yusuke looked at him with a frown. “You cannot lie to us _and_ to yourself.”

Ren grimaced, looking at them all. “Which one of you snooped into my family, anyway, huh? Who went asking about my Personas?”

“That doesn't matter--”

“I did.” Haru wasted no time speaking up. “We can't leave you acting like this, so we needed to find what the cause was. That meant me talking to not only your uncle, but other family members as well.”

Ren’s face contorted in anger. “You little…! My family is none of your business! That goes for all of you! Hell, past Yusuke I have no reason to care about you past the Phantom Thief business. And same could be said about you all with me!”

“W-what?!” Futaba jumped up. “But you helped us all awaken to a new strength… You…”

“Did it to make navigating the Metaverse easier!” Ren snapped, making Futaba take a step back as Makoto stood to act as a barrier between the two.

“So everything was fake, then?” Morgana spoke up, looking up at Ren through teary eyes. “You don't care about any of this? Anything we've entrusted you with…?”

Ren simply nodded.

“Fine…” The tears in Morgana’s eyes began to dry as he spoke, voice sturdier with each word. “If you feel that way, feel that way. I'll lead the group to where they're needed instead!”

A rush of energy filled the room and it was clear Morgana had awoken to a new power. This was the first time any of them had seen or heard of Ren causing one through anger and betrayal…

“Then I'll be leaving.” Ren made fort the door and Yusuke reached for his arm, the Phantom just escaping his grasp.

“Renren!” Ryuji called after his best friend. “This isn't over man! We're not gonna give up on you like that!”

Ren glared back at Ryuji. “The cat seems to think otherwise.”

“Morgana’s just upset. We all are…” Ann bit her lip. “You're not acting like yourself, and Morgana’s gonna see it more than anyone else!”

“Then maybe I should let you all cool off. Don't want my head bitten off because you _care_ so much.” He went for the door again and they knew there wasn't much they could do. It was up to Sojiro and Sae now…

 

\--

 

When Ren walked out of Leblanc, Sojiro and Sae wasted no time pouncing. Him walking out was definitely a sign that the other teens had failed and they needed to try and do _something,_ anything. Hopefully they could succeed where they had failed.

“Amamiya.” Sae was the first to speak as she moved to cut him off. “We need to talk.”

“Futaba tells me they know what's causing you to act like this… And that it's something we can fix if you get rid of something.” Sojiro approached from behind, cutting off both escape routes Ren might have.

“I don't know what they were telling you, but they're wrong.” He scoffed, rolling his eyes. “There's nothing wrong with me, anyway.”

“Nothing wrong with you?” Sojiro sputtered. “You made Futaba cry, treated your cat like trash… That's just scraping the top of all the things you've been doing recently!”

“From what Makoto’s told me, it's been concerning.” Sae crossed her arms as she stared him down. “If you keep going at this rate, she's afraid you're going to end up--”

“With a Palace? Like the one you had?” The venom in his words was clear.

Sae took a step back, eyes widening. “You…!”

“You trying to talk to me about my actions is pretty damn hypocritical, huh?” Ren smirked, eyes full of proud malice.

Sae froze, unable to say anything back. Not much she could say that wouldn't make her sound like hypocrite. The trickster knew exactly what he was doing by bringing that up, huh?

“You watch your tongue!” Sojiro put a hand on his shoulder. “You're in no position to talk to someone who saved your life like that!”

“So because she saved my life, I have to kiss her ass?” Ren looked back at Sojiro. “What bullshit!”

Sojiro froze, obviously trying to think of what to say. “I… That’s not what I...”

“That's what I thought.” Ren pushed through Sae. “Now, if you'll excuse me…”

With that, he walked away. The adults hadn't done anything more to convince him… If anything, they were worried that pushed him farther away… How did they go about telling the teens about how badly they’d failed?

 

\--

 

Anxiety had gripped Leblanc since Ren walked out. Said anxiety ended up only getting worse when the adults walked in without him. Did this mean both attempts to get through to him had failed?

“Sis…” Makoto spoke first, voice shaking. “Did you…?”

Sae looked away, eyes shutting tight. “I'm sorry, but…”

Futaba began crying as soon as it became clear talking to Ren hadn't worked. She ran into Makoto’s arms, leaving the older girl to stroke her hair while dealing with her own feelings on the mess.

Ann stood, running out with tears streaming down her cheeks. Haru followed after her, doing her best to hide that her lower lip was quivering. Yusuke soon also followed to attempt to calm the girls, eyes clear of moisture, but not of pain and betrayal.

Ryuji let out a curse, punching the table. Morgana moved over to him, curling next to his his side. The boy, forgetting his usual bickering with the not-cat to pull him close as he shook.

Sae and Sojiro shared a look. This wasn't going to end well if it kept going at this rate…

“Maybe you kids should… Give him some space and see if he goes back to normal.” Sojiro finally spoke up. “I don't want you all beating yourselves up over this.”

“He's right…” Ryuji wiped tears from his eyes. “Let's just wait to bring it up u-until a couple of weeks have passed! I'm sure it'll be fine.”

Morgana looked up at him, worry clear. They had already tried giving him space, would more space help at all…? “...I hope so.”

 

\--

 

Ren had turned down the fake Igor’s proposition quickly when out was brought to the table. There was no way someone like him was going to end up manipulated by a god. Especially not one that had made him and his fellow thieves disappear not too long ago.

Those fellow thieves made things easier for him, after all.

The real Igor was now in front of him, as was Lavenza. Lavenza, Caroline and Justine made whole… He'd expect the girl to care about him like they did, but that didn't seem to be the case. Especially now that their mutual enemy was gone.

“I see the Crawling Chaos has a grip on you.” She spoke, her quiet voice curt. “It's no surprise you rejected the God of Control so quickly.”

Ren made a face. “What are you talking about?”

Lavenza let out a sigh, refusing to make eye contact with the Trickster. “You do not even realize… I wonder what the Great Master saw in you.”

“Great Master?”

Another sigh, this one annoyed. “The Great Master Philemon. Wild Cards are important to him… But one so easily seduced by the chaos…”

She trailed off and Ren couldn't care less. All he knew was the name Philemon made his skin crawl. If he could never hear about this Great Master again, that would be wonderful.

“Well, who knows and who cares?” Ren sneered at the girl. “Just tell me what to do next.”

Lavenza held her grimoire to her chest, as if putting distance between the two of them. “Very well, you need to…”

 

\--

 

Morgana hadn’t looked at Ren the same way since he’d taken the time to save all the Phantom Thieves. Apparently Morgana was basically humanity’s hope and, for something as small as his favored Persona, didn’t trust the Trickster at all. It kind of pissed him off, if he was being honest; it almost made him think he should’ve gone and done this on his own. But whatever, he couldn’t say to hell with the other thieves now.

“You know, when this is over…” Mona frowned at him, ears against his round head.

“I’m almost wondering if you’ll be the next obstacle.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Joker tilted his head to the side. “After this, nothing’ll be able to stand up to us.”

“You say that, but you’re going to end up part of something bigger… And not on the side any human should want to be on.” Mona spoke, regret in his voice. “I thought you would be a great aid to the bet, but…”

“Bet? What the hell are you talking about?” Joker kicked the not-cat just a little too hard and Mona let out a hiss. “Don’t be so vague, you stupid cat!”

He shook his head and looked towards the upward battle they were about to face. “It doesn’t matter. You’ll understand eventually, if you’re lucky enough to get that far.”

Joker was once again about to try and speak, but Mona ran forward to the others, still glowing with a light that made Joker sick. He began barking orders to the others, telling them the plan. Looked like he was ready to separate himself enough to become the leader, huh? Too bad for him, though. Joker knew he was still in control.

“Alright, everyone.” He stepped forward, grinning down at the angry beacon of hope. “Let’s do this! Fox, Panther, and Queen’ll come with me. The rest of you’ll be back up. Don’t lag behind too much.”

“We won’t.” Mona puffed out his chest, doing his best to act as tough and strong as he could. It was pathetic, Joker had to bite his tongue to keep from pointing it out. “In fact, we might get ahead of you, if you’re not careful.”

“I’d like to see that, but I doubt it’ll happen.” Joker’s voice was filled with a mocking venom. “Your legs are miniscule, Skull has a bum leg, Noir isn’t gonna move that quickly with her stupid, bulky weapons… There’s a reason you three aren’t part of this rush.”

Skull scoffed. “If we weren’t nearly at the finishing line, I’d say us three should ditch your ass…”

“Wanna say that louder, Skull?”

“Nah.” He shook his head. “Come on, Noir, Monamona. We’ll show this guy how useful we are!”

“Yes!”

“For once, we agree, Skull!”

Joker rolled his eyes a he turned away from them. Let them think they’d be useful somehow. It would probably keep them from getting rebellious and trying to turn against him before this was over. They all needed to be focused to get rid of this annoying God of Control.

Then things could be more fun for Ren.

\--

Yaldabaoth was proving nearly impossible to defeat, no matter how much they whittled away at his health. They were on the ground, unable to stand and face him… It was seemingly hopeless… The God of Control had so much control that not even rebels could stand against him…

That was when Joker was hit with a sudden surge of power. He rose to his feet, strength and power whispering in his ear and building his confidence. Behind him appeared Arsene, the chains once again in his hands.

“Begone!” He pulled on the chains, breaking them into nothing and Arsene changed, from something small into something much, _much_ bigger than anyone else there.

Satanael. The name flowed into Joker’s head as the large, demon lord appeared next to the platform the thieves were slowly pulling themselves off of. This was the strongest Persona he had ever harnessed the power of… And it was exhilarating.

The Persona’s presence was so strong, so overwhelming, that it was hard to look away from him. His golden horns squirmed, as if they were actually tentacles, eyes glowing a bright red. A blue ribbon was wrapped around his chest and he held out a black gun, decorated in gold and green… It would be impressive, if not for the words that spilled out of Mona’s mouth.

“The Crawling Chaos’s influence on him has grown that much, then?” His voice shook as he stared at the Persona. “Enough that his other Personas are starting to show the influence and power?”

“Mona-chan…” Noir looked at him with a frown. “Does that mean…?”

“It means we’re trading off one problem for another.” Mona looked terrified as he spoke, staring up at the Demon Lord Persona pointing his gun at Yaldabaoth. “It’s not looking good for us, guys…”

All of their eyes squeezed shut as the trigger was pulled and a hole was blown into Yaldabaoth’s face. This should’ve been a moment of happiness, celebration, triumph… But it just made dread settle in their stomachs. This was just going to be the start of more problems.

Problems for everyone other than Ren, that was.

\--

Ren was sitting on the idea of possibly throwing himself to the wolves for the sake of throwing Shido in the slammer. Sae had approached him and made it clear it was the only way and it was honestly annoying. He’d end up being alone in jail just to get another guy behind bars?

He hated the idea, and had told Sae a much, but she kept pushing. He’d done what he could to not budge on his ‘no’ but that woman was ridiculously pushy about things. Eventually they had agreed to give him the rest of Christmas Eve to think about it, Sae planning on stopping by on Christmas morning to look for his answer.

Seeing as he was supposed to think on it… He decided to not do that at all. Instead, he texted Yusuke, asking him to come over to Leblanc for some quality alone time. He might as well try and be a good boyfriend, even if there was a good chance he wouldn’t be leaving. Might be good to at least try and make up for the museum thing (though, deep down, Ren really didn’t feel bad about it anymore).

“Ren, are you alright?” Yusuke looked at him with a frown on his face. “You haven’t been saying much since I showed up. Did I say something to upset you?”

“Huh? Fine. Don’t bother me when I’m thinking.” He returned the frown and Yusuke looked away.

“My apologies… I just know we’ve all been through so much and… Everything with Morgana…” He shook his head. “I thought you were upset about it, or perhaps wrongly excited. Your recent behavior would be more in line with that.”

“As frank as ever, huh?” Ren scoffed, rolling his eyes. “Why do I put up with it?”

“Because you’re just as bad, if not worse than I am.” Yusuke tilted his head to the side.

Ren opened his mouth, but let it close. Yusuke wasn’t technically wrong in this moment and, as much as he wanted to bite back about Yusuke doing it more often, he _was_ trying to be a good boyfriend. Couldn’t push it too far, not today.

“Fair enough, I guess…” He sat back against the back of the couch and frowned. “So…”

“Ah, I have something for you.” Yusuke pulled a small canvas from his back. “It took me hours to even begin to enjoy how this looks, so I hope it’s alright with you.”

Ren looked it over and frowned. It was a painting of him, and it looked plenty like him. Same face shape, same hair style, same everything… Except for the smile. Ren hadn’t smiled like the painting of him was for a while now (and he wasn’t sure he’d ever smile like that again). It was almost weird looking at that when that was the case… Like a bad case of the uncanny valley.

“Ah, judging by your face… You don’t like it?” Yusuke tilted his head to the side. “I suppose I should have seen that coming.”

“It’s painted well.” Ren shrugged. “I just don’t know. Something about the expression isn’t sitting well with me.”

“It’s because you don’t ever show anyone a joyous face anymore, not even yourself.” Yusuke didn’t pull any punches when he spoke, even when others were walking on eggshells around Ren, huh?

“That so?” Ren rolled his eyes, tossing the image to the side and ignoring Yusuke’s flinch. “I don’t want to look at it anymore.”

“I see.” Yusuke stood up, adjusting the bag around his arm. “I’ll be going, then. If you don’t enjoy the art, I can’t see you enjoying my company now.”

Without another word, he stiffly walked to where the canvas had landed and picked it up. He didn’t even look back as he pushed it back into his bag and made for the stairs. Ren considered saying something, but in the end, figured it’d just make things worse.

He had really failed at being a good boyfriend, hadn’t he? Oh well, it wasn’t his fault that Yusuke’s painting had been so horrible.

...Maybe he should just go to bed.

\--

_“You’re falling deeper and deeper.” Takahisa was in front of him again, after days and days of not appearing in his dreams. “Perhaps the name Joker is a cursed one.”_

_“What do you mean by that?”_

_“Dying let’s you learn a lot of things…” Takahisa chuckled, sipping at his alcohol. “Including learning that you’re not the first ‘Joker’ that he’s used. You’re about the third, second if we’re only looking at this specific universe.”_

_Ren furrowed his brow, sitting in front of Takahisa. “I don’t get it. Everytime you talk to me, you just scare and confuse me more.”_

_Takahisa chuckled. “Then perhaps you need to think on everything that’s happened recently. Don’t be like Reiji when it comes to this. He could afford to not think on Nyarlathotep and what he did to him… You can’t.”_

_Ren crossed his arms. “I don’t get it… Is there a rhyme or reason to who has to worry about seeing Nyarlathotep as a Persona?”_

_“I suppose there is.” Takahisa nodded. “If you’re Reiji Kido, you have no reason to worry. If you’re anyone else, you should worry.”_

_“Not helpful.”_

_Takahisa let out a chuckle as Ren glowered at him. “It still answers your question.”_

_“I guess it does, but I was hoping you’d have a better answer. Something that could, uh, reveal some way to let me help myself.”_

_“Like I told you. Think on it all, see what you decide. Maybe you’ll be just strong enough to pull away from the Crawling Chaos’s power.” Takahisa gave a shrug. “You Wild Cards are apparently impressive, even by Persona user standards, after all.”_

_“Think on it…” Ren nodded. He would keep that in mind until he woke up. Hopefully he’d somehow be able to remember it. “I just need to think on it.”_

_“Yes… Good luck remembering what I’ve said, boy.” Takahisa chuckled as Ren began to mumble the words under his breath. “I wish you luck from here on out, actually. This is the last time we’ll meet.”_

_“Last time…?” He frowned. “I’ll never dream about you again?”_

_Takahisa shook his head. “Never.”_

_Ren frowned, crossing his arms. “I don’t know if that’s a good or a bad thing.”_

_“I suppose you’ll find out eventually…” Takahisa gave him a sad, empty smile. “Goodbye.”_

\--

When Sae appeared at Leblanc, Ren hadn’t wasted anytime saying yes to going to jail to get Shido behind bars. Of course, it wasn’t really him wanting that bastard behind bars, he was fine with him just suffering from guilt… But he felt being away from people would be good… To let him think without his “friends” trying to influence him.

He didn’t even know why he started wanting to think on everything so hard, honestly. He’d just woken up from a dream with a start and felt the urge to do it… So he’d spent the rest of the night trying to weigh any pros against all the cons of letting himself be jailed for who knows how long.

Futaba and Sojiro made it clear they didn’t like the fact he made this choice without talking to them about it first, but whatever. It wasn’t like they were his family, so there was no reason for him to say shit to any of them. Hell, it’d probably be counterproductive to tell them, anyway. They would probably start enjoying him being gone soon enough, anyway…

Not that they would admit that that to his face. Fine by him, some people were just too weak to ever share what they thought. Pathetic, really. He would be sure to say that to their faces when he got back.

Well, as long as jail time didn’t make him feel differently, of course.

\--

Ren hadn’t been back for long, but Yusuke was already starting to see the boy he loved again. It was like before he had ever taken on Nyarlathotep… The same smile and interest he had in Yusuke returned to as it had been. The same friendly worry he had for others apparent in every word he spoke.

Yusuke had missed this. He truly did believe that, how did that one American song put it, that you ‘don’t know what you got till it’s gone.’

But he was lucky enough to have gotten ‘it’ back. The Ren Amamiya he had fallen in love with those months ago… And now they were spending their Valentine's Day together, sitting together in a Leblanc booth. He supposed it was girls who were supposed to give chocolates only today, but that didn’t matter to him.

“I spent the night making this for you.” He held out a strange chocolate creation, colors blending together as if it was an abstract piece of art. Of course Yusuke would never separate his art from any creation he made. “It represents all the emotions that have overcome me since you’ve returned!”

“Oh, Yusuke!” Ren smiled at him. “Thank you, it looks great. I can’t wait to try some of it.”

Yusuke was all too pleased for himself. “I’m glad to hear that, though I would suggest saving it for a while… I want you to… To…”

“To…?” Ren tilted his head to the side.

“To remember me by my creations. You didn’t enjoy my Christmas present for you, so I was hoping this would be more enjoyable…” Yusuke looked away. “I want us to part on a positive note.”

“Yusuke…” Ren gave him a small frown, one full of regret. “I was just upset on Christmas Eve. I shouldn’t have said any of that to you… Your painting was amazing!” Ren put a hand on Yusuke’s. “If you’d ever consider giving it to me again, I would treasure it.”

A sparkle came to Yusuke’s eyes. “Ren…”

“Yusuke…”

Yusuke gave a ridiculously happy smile. “This relationship will fuel my muse, even with so much distance between us!”

Ren gave an amused laugh. “That it will, that it will.”

\--

“So you’re saying he’s for sure back to normal?” Ann’s eyes lit up in excitement as she hung over Haru’s shoulders. “Us losing our Personas came in handy!”

“Agreed!” Haru giggled, nodding her head. “It’s wonderful, who knew that's all we needed to beat that being.”

“Indeed.” Yusuke hummed, pleased with his report to the rest of the group. “Our worries are behind us now.”

“Good, I’d hate to worry while we couldn’t keep an eye on him again.” Makoto let out a relieved sigh. “Him in jail was worrying enough.”

“This time we would’ve been able to keep an eye on him through his electronics, though.” Futaba wasted no time putting that out there. “...But less work for me this way!”

“Hell yeah!” Ryuji pumped his fist. “It’s… Just too bad Morgana isn’t here to see this…”

They all went silent for a moment, pain of their lost companion hitting them again…

“We should look at it differently, everyone.” Haru spoke up, her voice as soft as could be. “Mona-chan is surely watching over us, right? I’m sure he’s proud of us for what we’ve done. And I’m sure he’d happy that Ren-kun is back to his normal self.”

“Haru-chan is right!” Ann wasted no time speaking up, hand to her chest. “We should be happy, for Morgana.”

“Y-yeah!”

“You’re right…!”

“Nothing can stop us now…” Yusuke smiled, eyes closed. “Our future is looking bright!”

\--

Lavenza was more than a little unhappy when she saw Ren Amamiya walk into the Velvet Room. She regretted ever allowing him the key to enter of his own free will when she was still Caroline and Justine… Someone like him? Someone like him should never step into a domain under the watchful eye of Philemon.

“It’s you.” Her voice was plain, full of anger that was sure to remind him of Caroline. “Is there a reason you are?”

“I thought I would say goodbye…” He blinked, looking oh so much like he had before Nyarlathotep ever entered his life. “I know we got off to a shaky start, but without you two, I wouldn’t be here!”

“I suppose that’s true enough…” She held her grimoire up in front of herself, to act as a barrier. Still better to be safe than sorry, she felt. “...But I’m not sure you’re welcome here.”

Ren frowned at her. “So you guys aren’t fans of me, then?”

Igor shook his head. “We hold nothing against you, dear Trickster. It’s simply a shame…”

“Master…?” Lavenza looked over at him, brow furrowed. “What do you…?”

“A shame you were more like your uncle’s brother than you ever were your uncle…” Igor let his eyes close and he shook his head. “You held potential, more than many of our other guests… But I am afraid it seems it may be squandered in the end.”

Ren narrowed his eyes, a shiver going down Lavenza’s spine at the very sight of it. “Are you gonna do anything about it?”

This was more like the Ren Lavenza had been able to meet… She hated it, wanted to summon a Persona and step between Ren and her Master. She couldn’t risk Igor getting hurt, not again…! She couldn’t fail him again.

Igor simply chuckled, unfazed. “All I can do is watch and assist you in my own way, dear boy. My job is no more and no less. Anything from here on out depends on your heart and whatever strength you hold within it.”

“That so…” He seemed to relax a bit, though Lavenza could still see signs of agitation around his eyes. “Good, good. I wouldn’t want you meddling in my life like that fake you did.”

“I suppose that would lead you down a path you wouldn’t want, hm?” Lavenza frowned at him, tone gaining a more acidic edge with every word. “You wouldn’t want to end up a simple puppet in some god’s game--”

“Lavenza.” Igor held up a hand to silence his small attendant. “Remember, you are also only allowed to watch and assist in your own ways as well.”

She looked at her feet, ashamed by her outburst. “M-master, I’m sorry….!”

Ren let out a snort and turned around. “I guess I’ll be leaving, unless you have something else to say to me.”

“...You’re representing the Tower Arcana more and more by the minute.” Lavenza shook her head. “...Goodbye, may we meet again when you’ve come to your senses.”

“Sure, sure.” And with that, Ren left.

It took all of Lavenza’s being to not fall to her knees, overwhelmed. It seemed there was no hope to stop this… The question in her mind was clear, based off all she had learned from her siblings and her Master. Would this be another victory for the Crawling Chaos…?

\--

The group once known as the Phantom Thieves were on their way to Ren’s hometown, smiles all around. It was a bit bittersweet, having to say goodbye to someone who had become so important to all of them in the past year, but… There were more positives to this than negatives. Especially seeing how things had been going in December.

“This was all crazy, don’t you think?” Ryuji put his hands behind his head. “I mean, it feels like just yesterday I was meeting Renren for the first time!”

“Indeed… It seems like it’s taken no time for us to go from so powerless to so powerful.” Yusuke hummed a bit. “It’s an odd, but not an unwelcome feeling.”

“Yeah…!” Futaba nodded. “I-I don’t know where I would be if it wasn’t for Ren and you guys, honestly…”

“I could say the same thing…” Haru put a hand to her cheek as she thought on what could have been. “I would probably be married to Sugimura at this point if you hadn’t given me your strength.”

Makoto glanced back at the group via the mirror. “Everyone… I’m so glad we met.”

“I am too!” Ann nodded and giggled. “I can’t think of any downside to all of this… Well, besides the fact we have to say goodbye to Ren now…”

“It’ll be alright.” He sent a smile to all of them. “We can stay in contact! We have phones and social media, right? In this day and age it’s hard to drift apart short of…”

“Prison, Mister Nasty Crimeboy?” Futaba gave him a cheshire grin and he stuck his tongue out at her.

“Oh haha, Futaba!”

“Well hey, that’s not the only thing that kinda sucks if you think about it!” Ryuji sat up and frowned. “It’s kinda a bummer we don’t have Personas anymore, don’t you think…?”

“Oh yeah…” Ann frowned, hugging herself. “I honestly kinda miss Hecate. B-but there’s some good to come out of that.”

“Indeed. We just have to remember them for what they were.” Haru gave a sad smile. “The loss of power will be jarring for a while, though, I’m sure.”

Ren frowned, brow furrowed. “I guess I shouldn’t…”

Makoto glanced at him from the corner of her eye. “What is it, Ren? Is there something you need to tell us.”

“I can still summon a Persona, actually.” Ren shrugged his shoulders. “You all remember Nyarlathotep, right?”

Haru let out a sharp gasp and Yusuke grunted, teeth gritting. The others weren’t reacting much better, Futaba burying her face in the nearest shirt possible. Ann and Ryuji both looked about ready to jump out of the speeding van, and Makoto’s grip on the steering wheel was tight enough to turn her knuckles white.

“What? You think he’d be gone that quickly?” He let out a laugh, shaking his head. “You guys are pretty dumb, don’t you think?”

“Ren…” Futaba’s voice was weak and shaky. “You…”

“I’m no different from when I went to jail… Besides the fact I got better at tricking you idiots.” Ren grinned down at her with malicious glee. “But that doesn’t matter right now. We’re in the middle of a friendly road trip… My mom and dad are _sure_ to be excited to see me.”

He turned forward again, the others silent and full of fear. This was fine by him. Let them be afraid! It made this all the more fun as he moved towards his new goal, as the only known Persona user to be able to summon in the real world…

As he thought over his glee, Haru sent a frantic text to someone. Someone who might have a clue as to what to do about this, and might just prove his ‘only Persona user who can summon in the real world’ theory wrong…

Though, only time could tell… And as it was right now? Time didn’t seem to be on their side.

**Author's Note:**

> Kolibris (Art featuring P1 characters, the Haru art, and the Ren/Kandori's Nyarly bonus art): https://twitter.com/kolibrisAO3
> 
> Kuno (The cover art of Nyarly/Ren and his fellow thieves/crops of said art): https://kunokocchi.tumblr.com/
> 
> Check their stuff out, they're super great and deserve some love <3


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